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Demos (vol. 1)

by Cocoon Hum

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1.
Electrified hair Plugging in the air. Storms straight up the ceiling, Head to the limits. Bursting all the window panes, Wires tightening my brain. One look and I can change Every moon phase. Dragging my chained wings, I use my nails as keys. The tidal wave reaches the door. All covered in sores - all covered in sores. Tear down the cage by the howl, I bleed from the mouth. I spit in the water I walk on. Mine is the light of dawn. Rags on fire, moulting skin, Weak but up the chin.
2.
Switch off. The streets are quiet. Neighbours locked, The only sound out there. This is not a cell, It's for your own good. Fear is spreading Faster than ever Outside the walls, Inside your own head. Let it flow and We'll all be drowned. Panic is here, Guides your hand. We are alone Paving the way out.
3.
This is my last goodbye, The last handful of soil. I slammed the door, Hatred won't prevail. I've got over you Without tarnishing my soul. I no longer conceal my scars, They make me harder to spoil. Thanks to you I'm aware of what I don't want to go through. Because of you I know the path I'm not going to choose. You inspired me to be nothing like you. And I'm grateful, so grateful for that. Forced loveless chances, I knew you were unworthy. Hypocrite schemer, Your void left me weary, But crawling I rose. You never even worried. It's been always like this: Narcissists never say sorry.
4.
Threads of sunlight Hardly filter through the cracks. I catch them in flight To sew the hours together. I don't open the window, Loneliness could sneak inside. I roam around my room Raising dust and blowing feathers. I've got all I need For not feeling trapped: To be helpless And at the end of my tether. Time loop slowing down as days go by, Ending with the beginning of the ending of the beginning. I wait for dusk in vain, It links to another gap. The air is not renewing. Today got stuck forever.
5.
Tossing and turning, Knots in my guts. Lower all the blinds To blind my own eyes. Excessive exposure, Mistake lies for truths. Information overflowing, Can't be if I don't see. In my comfort zone I sink into the pages. In my cave alone, Blind and deaf for ages. Isolating the brain, Tension cracks my skull. Sublimanipulation Sapping the beast patience. Find your own fiction by pulling all wires out. Recover your primal essence by removing the blindfold.
6.
(Keys, wallet, phone) Make sure you won't come across any neighbour. (Keys, wallet, phone) Open the door, check, lock and go downstairs. (Keys, wallet, phone) Check, take a deep breath, lower the head. (Keys, wallet, phone) Stare at your shoes, check, speed up, speed up... (Keys, wallet, phone) Avoid crowds, traffic light changes to green. (Keys, wallet, phone) Check everytime you turn a corner. (Keys, wallet, phone) Go back to your place avoiding eye contact. (Keys, wallet, phone) You're short of breath: you don't find the keys. (Keys, wallet, phone) Racing pulse, cold sweat down your stiff spine. (Keys, wallet, phone) Empty your bag, lost your sense of touch. (Keys, wallet, phone) Holding them since you got to your street. (Keys, wallet, phone) Check. Upstairs. Unlock. Inside. Close. Check.
7.
A tight schedule to make my own life a maze. I don't know which way to go so I will stay. I've got plenty of time to seize the day. I fill my increasingly tall walls With pristine stuff to patch my holes. Leaky me, I would burst in as a waterfall. I'm not ready yet, I'll do it tomorrow. I lengthen my neverending to-do list, Stuff my mind so I can silence my own creeps. Now there's no room for anxiety when I'm busy.
8.
Hanging by a thread, Too fragile to look ahead. Stillness swallows my steps. I'm floating all the way, Away from any contact. Out of touch, out of sight. The air is getting thicker, It gets harder day by day. Just one distant voice Could rupture my eardrum. Bouncing against thin glass, Tearing air with your teeth. Sun looks away, Shadows hiding the rift. I stumble with myself, Dropping as a leave. Ground's not hard enough, It would crack with a spit. A snap of my fingers And all silence is betrayed. Just need one deep breath To make this place collapse.
9.
Underwater. Mooring rope around my ankle. Sea is clear, Dissolving all my layers. Untangle My soaking hair with the waves. Untie the knot. Seabed is mainland, I know the way.

about

A finales de febrero del 2020 reanudé la escritura de letras de canciones después de años de sequía. Ponerles música era el nuevo reto, siendo yo una completa amateur. Este es el primer volumen de demos grabadas en el salón de mi casa, publicadas por orden cronológico de creación.

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released March 3, 2021

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Cocoon Hum Barcelona, Spain

Reencontrarme con esas cápsulas del tiempo, esas libretas en las que había estado escribiendo letras de canciones desde los dieciocho años, fue lo que hizo que recuperase un viejo sueño que veía inalcanzable y lo convirtiera al fin en una realidad: hacer mis propias canciones, porque aunque por un tiempo hubiera dejado de escribir yo nunca he dejado de tararear. ... more

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